How to Tell if a Girl Likes You: For Autistic Individuals


Dating is not always easy and everyone experiences uncertainty about whether they are reading the signals from their potential partner correctly. However, when you throw autism into the mix, this can complicate things further.

If you are on the autism spectrum, it’s only natural to want to tell if a girl likes you so let’s look at some of the signals, both via text and face to face, which can make reading the situation easier.

Take It Slow

When we are keen on someone it’s a natural instinct to want to keep in contact with them frequently, see them as often as we can and sometimes declare our feelings too quickly. However, the dating game is tricky and sometimes seeming too eager can cause the other person to withdraw. It’s also difficult to know sometimes whether someone sees you as a friend or whether a romantic relationship is on the horizon.

It’s All In the Text

How can you tell on text whether the girl of your dreams wants to hear more from you?

One of the first signs that a girl likes you is if she starts conversations over text and responds relatively quickly when you reply. She is keen to keep the interaction going. Other signals are she readily agrees with your point of view; asks your opinion of her; often laughs at your jokes; and engages with what you are saying.

Things are going well but you may still be unsure whether she sees you as a friend or as a potential boyfriend. If you rush in immediately and suggest a date, there is the risk you might be turned down. So here’s a slightly different way to approach the situation.

Let’s say you have discovered a great bar that has opened in town. Instead of taking the direct approach and asking your love interest out directly by texting “want to come to that new bar in town with me next Saturday?” Instead mention the topic but leave it to her to express enthusiasm. You can text over something like “heard that the new bar which has opened in the High Street is really good. We should head there some time.”

If she is keen, she should respond enthusiastically and maybe even suggest a couple of days when she is free. If she is not so keen she may agree in a non-committal way but let the conversation drop. Either way, at least you know where you stand, plus you haven’t been turned down because you just put it out there as a possibility.

Reading The Signs When You Are Face to Face

If you are face to face with a girl you like there are several ways which can help you find out whether she likes you in a romantic way.

Keeping Eye Contact and Mirroring

When you are attracted to someone, you want to look at them all the time and the same is true for girls. They hold eye contact because they are in to you and want to show they are giving you their full attention. Mirroring happens when we unconsciously take the same actions as the other person, maybe taking a sip of drink at the same time or moving our hands in the same way. Both are great signs.

Lots of Little Touches

We don’t touch someone we don’t want to be around so if she often touches your arm, brushes against you when you are side by side or taps your shoulder to get your full attention, then she definitely enjoys spending time with you.

She’s Keen to Laugh at Your Jokes

Maybe you aren’t the best joke teller in the world but this girl seems to find you funnier than most and that’s a good sign. In a group situation she laughs just a little louder than everyone else and this means she wants to show you she appreciates you.

Looking Her Best

If you head out for a night and its obvious your date has gone to a lot of effort to look her best, it’s clear she wants the evening to go well. She may even reappear after heading to the bathroom with her lipstick reapplied or smelling of another quick spray of perfume.

Spending Time With You

One of the most obvious signs is that she wants to spend time with you and she makes every effort to do so. Maybe suggesting places to go, asking for help with something or even just singling you out to talk to when you are in a group situation.

If you recognize these signals, you can feel confident that the girl you like feels the same way. If dating turns to something deeper, it’s also important to remember that the best relationships thrive on openness. So if there comes a time when you feel ready to talk about autism it will usually lead to an even closer relationship.